Crawling


Sometimes it feels like im crawling thru life. Things happen, fast enough, yet i feel so sluggish, i wonder why. Techinically, im jacking my own case....procrastinating....but still...u know that feeling..where u jsut dont like the way ur life seems to have stalled, even though everything is supposedly working fine....

Perhaps, its this indecision. I dont know my vocation in life. i just know i love people. And im too forthright for my own good. And im bored quick. And i hate people lying to me..though it IS one rule for the gander n one for the goose....

Comments

Anonymous said…
ditto.......tho d goose n gander bit is a lit-tle scary ;-)
August 04, 2006 12:11 pm
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I follow two diets, one just isnt enough.

From the past 6 months or so, I resolved I needed to lose about 30 kilos, the healthiest and fastest way I could. In December 2007, I weighed all of a very flabby, miserable and roly poly 84 kilos. Needless to say, on my 5 ft 3 frame, it all looked like a very robust sack of potatoes destined for the relief of a famine ravaged country. Today, I’m a fat, but healthier 74 kilos. And the work is still in progress. It’s all a combination of diet, hunger pangs, exercise, green tea and looking long and hard at all the lovely clothes i want to wear, but cant because my flubber makes itself very prominent in spandex ltd. This post does have a point, before I ramble any more. My motto for most anything in life is, If you do what you always did, you’ll get what you always got. And that is helping me bear whatever small discomfort and big problems that life keeps throwing at me. It’s weird, how one after another I’m in such scrapes, where my reality and sense of self tethers on my uncertain futur
Read more

Involuntary Bliss

Life is full of surprises, twists, turns, exclamation marks, and now I want a full stop. Antagonism, fortitude, gossip, appearances, patience, perseverance, apathy, I hate all of it. I want to be cosseted, shielded, loved, admired, and adored. Silly isn’t it. I want what I don’t want. Yet, somehow, it would make so much more sense to fit in, adhere, conform and accept. And swallow the bitter pill. Why even take what others dish out in a way, why, because that is where social acceptance lies. Do I want to be socially active? Yes, because I want to be admired, not by just anyone, but by those I admire. It’s such shameful thing to be me now. The antithesis of all that I wanted to be. Agnes is but a dream, and oh so far. I chose to be who I am and I regret every waking moment of my life today. Sometimes. Because even my blissful moments are so involuntary, that they exhaust me with the thought that lingers, will they come back again, will they last, are they backed by doubtful intentions,
Read more

Cheese, anyone ?

The other day,while chatting with a friend, i came up with one of my inevitable wisecracks. We were just discussing this Damocles sword hanging over my head, in the form of the CFA Level 1 ...and how I really needed help and prayers. I asked him to pray for me, apparently since God nowadays listens to sinners. He replied, "But I thought God helped those who helps themselves." I said, " Oh, no God is changing. Someone moved his cheese." Guffaw.
Read more